by Bob Carson

Editor’s Note: The USTA website is pleased to present freelance writer Bob Carson and his popular “Outside the Box” features. This monthly series is a menu of outlandish proposals presented with a wink — but the purpose behind them is serious. The views contained in this column are that of the author alone, and do not necessarily represent the opinions or views of the United States Trotting Association.

“Politics is the entertainment branch of industry.” — Frank Zappa

Bob Carson

Harness racing has learned, often painfully, that we must rely on politicians. Politicians are not always reliable. Even the politicians we can count on are eventually replaced with new faces that may not be on the same track as their predecessors. Making state governments see our light is a never-ending rat race.

Harness racing has no choice but to keep working on the political frontlines. Lobbying and politics are unsavory games that must be played, and played to win. Thirty years ago, our agrarian roots gave us a little muscle; politicos at least knew we were out there racing around. Today, a person entering the political arena may not know harness racing from a hula-hoop, but you can bet your last chip that new legislators will be intimately acquainted with casino interests.

Let’s give our lobbyists a tool to work with, let’s give them a calling card. And let’s make sure that people who run for public office at least know we are out here. Let’s give them a personal stake in our game.

This plan is free, easy and fun.

Let’s say that Michigan has primaries for State representative elections. Our horse racing lobbyists should supply the list of candidates running for state office to all members of our our little racing fraternity. Candidates whose sympathetic ears would be of great value in future legislation should be highlighted. Breeding farms should be the first to receive this list.

Autumn Ryan graphic

You own Whispering Woods Breeding Farm. You receive your list of names that are running for state office. Two of the highlighted names in the political arena are in your district; Richard J. Fontana and Martha M. Unger. It’s time to have a little fun and do a little lobbying.

You start by doing an internet search of these candidates. Since they are running for public office it will be simple to learn personal data, educational background, work history, hobbies, charities, etc.

“A life-long Republican, 52-year-old Richard Fontana worked 26 years as an accountant; he has been married to Mary for 27 years. He has two daughters who have graduated from the Columbia School system. This is his first run for state representative after serving two terms as School Board President.”

A little further research into his Facebook page shows that, “Although a decade late to the scene, Richie Fontana became a fan of “The British Invasion.” He never outgrew his passion and remains a fan of this music. He has an extensive collection of vinyl records from 1965 to 1971. He even has a data base with a link to his collection.”

One of the many albums on this link is to a British group, Wayne Fontana and the Mindbenders, a group who recorded the number one chart topper “Game of Love” in 1965. The coincidence of last names gives you a hook.

You decide to name one of your weanlings “Fontana’s Mindbender.”

“A Democrat, 48-year-old Mary Unger, is running for her second term as state representative.”

Finding material on Mary Unger is simple; she has her own website outlining her political philosophies and personal information. She has links to various organizations and associations. One of the links leads to Mary’s primary hobby — bird watching. Mary has been an ardent ornithologist for over two decades and has traveled extensively in search of rare sightings. She often speaks and leads groups of birdwatchers and even lists her itinerary of bird walks for the upcoming year.

You decide to name another of your weanlings “Unger the Bird Walk.”

You may say naming horses in conjunction with citizens who may be of use in protecting harness racing is unseemly, blatant and offensive. Please. The entire act of lobbying and being lobbied is about as subtle as door to door vacuum salesmen. Lobbyists consistently rank below lawyers and used car salesmen on the popularity meter. Lobbying is abhorrent and repugnant — unless they help you get your way, at which point they become champions of right and virtue.

Are wacky horse names tied to politician’s long shots? Sure. But they are free shots. You never know when a wild shot might hit a useful target. Having a horse, or a bridge, or a star in the galaxy named after you is flattering. If you discovered that something was named with you in mind, a baseball field or a new species of fern, the naming would tweak your interest and compel you to investigate.

Naming the horse may be as far as you want to go. But you can go deeper. As a breeder interested in the future of harness racing, you should go deeper.

Obviously, your first step should be making sure the politician knows that you have chosen a name for a horse that has some significance to them. A simple e-mail with a photograph of the horse and a little background information would take only a few minutes.

You would be better served to spend more than a few minutes.

Invite the politician to your farm or racetrack or sales ring to meet the namesake horse. Anytime new people show up to watch horses being raised or are training, good things can happen. Horse folks are great hosts. Friendships can be made. Networking can take place. New owners and fans can be hooked. At the very least, if the politician gets elected and horse racing legislation is on the table we have a face, we are real, and we are not just another bill waiting for enactment.

When our lobbyists approach new government officials, and that official has a horse named after them, it gives our people a calling card, an ice breaker, a little something to set them apart from the crowd. And since horses have a bit of a shelf life from the farm to the races, the calling card has some staying power.

People running for office are looking for attention that can be converted into votes. It is very conceivable that media outlets are looking for “hooks” as they cover political races. This clever name of a horse might be the link that connects the sport, the government hopeful, and the media.

There are peripheral opportunities to help publicize harness racing. Suppose Mary Unger wants to bring her bird watching cronies to the farm to meet “Under the Bird Watch.” Maybe she wants to lead a bird walk on the property. That’s more people who would be exposed to harness racing. Maybe Wayne Fontana and his latest version of the “Mindbenders” are on the oldies circuit in the neighborhood. They might visit “Fontana’s Mindbender” with Richard. The musical group might do a gig at a racetrack. All of these possibilities are food for a hungry local press.

Horse names are potential assets, assets that we are wasting.

While perusing entries from last night’s harness races, many of the the names were intriguing, but not one of them was useful. If we run out of politicians to associate racehorse names with, we can chose media moguls, industrialists, celebrities, or just start with the phone book and select regular citizens. You never know when a name might be the spark that starts a fire. Therefore, we should not waste a single spark and give a purpose to every name we stick on every horse.

Mundane names like Fast Feet and Silver Hanover will not do us much good. Names such as Fontana’s Mindbender and Unger the Bird Walk offer possible connections to positive results.