Editor’s Note: The USTA website is pleased to present freelance writer Bob Carson and his popular “Outside the Box” features. This monthly series is a menu of outlandish proposals presented with a wink — but the purpose behind them is serious. The views contained in this column are that of the author alone, and do not necessarily represent the opinions or views of the United States Trotting Association.

Our world of harness horse racing presents quandaries for writers. Do you write to inform, or write to entertain? Do you probe or pander? Do you take risks, or play it safe? Do you write for the choir, or write for the great masses who do not know that we exist? Of great value is content that introduces new people to our sport, how do you reach this wider audience?

Quandaries of a more serious nature involve friends and family facing serious illness. The urge to help is always there. Do you join support groups, or march for the cure? Do you set up a go-fund me account, join an organization, or arrange a fundraising event? People with financial resources donating money to worthy organizations need to decide where to send the money where it will do the most good. Harness racing people are great. They try in many ways, big and small, to ease suffering. This might be one more way to do that.

A year ago, my family attended a fundraising run for Parkinson’s disease. The day was a joy. A large crowd of wonderful people walked around University Circle in a long conga line. As I looked at various family members, friends, strangers, volunteers, and people afflicted with this disease, a prototype of a project crossed my mind. See what you think.

The project would begin with an e-mail to a hundred, perhaps a thousand people. The people who receive this unusual e-mail would be on an active mailing list of patients, friends and families of patients in a selected state who receive regular e-newsletters about their disease. The possible mailing list is long because the needs are many — opioid addiction, cancer, Parkinson’s disease, Crohn’s disease, arthritis, etc. Many recipients of this strange e-mail may not know that harness horse racing exists.

For this prototype (since it is on my mind) let us use the state of Ohio, Parkinson’s disease and the hundreds of Ohio members on their e-mail newsletter list. The introduction would look something like this:

January, 2020

Dear Ohio friend in the battle against Parkinson’s disease,

Say hello to a new member of your family (insert photo of the yearling or 2-year-old horse).

His name is Stirred Not Shaken. He spent the first 16 months of his life on the rolling hills of a beautiful breeding farm in central Ohio (insert photo of farm).

Stirred Not Shaken was bred, born, and raised to race for money. This is not the Kentucky Derby style of racing. It is a unique category of racing where horses trot with a person behind the horse in a cart. This sport originated in the days when horse drawn carts and buggies were the main form of transportation. Racing horses in harness has remained popular with a segment of the horse racing world for more than 150 years (insert link that takes visitor to click here to see a sample race).

Stirred Not Shaken is young, equivalent to a 10-year-old child. Over the next seven months, he will grow, learn and practice to become a racehorse. If talented enough, this summer your horse will have the opportunity to begin racing for money, a great deal of money.

Okay, what does this have to do with you, a person on the Parkinson’s disease email list with little or zero knowledge of the sport of harness horse racing? The answer is — maybe plenty.

Every dollar Stirred Not Shaken earns over the next two years will go to research for Parkinson’s disease. The purchase price and all expenses incurred are a total donation.

All that you need to do is follow his progress via a link to this monthly column. When you read the link and watch a few videos, you will learn about this sport and have fun.

One more thing, when racing season rolls around and it is time for Stirred Not Shaken to race for money, your job is to cheer like crazy. As a side job, you may wish to learn about this intriguing sport/hobby/business and the people who participate in it.

Rest assured, nothing is, or will ever be, asked of you. Stirred Not Shaken is a gift, a gift with the chance of bringing a good deal of money to the race to cure and treat Parkinson’s disease. How good of a chance? Well, horse racing is always a longshot, but over his long career, the father of this horse has sired several babies that have earned hundreds of thousands of dollars.

Just as Parkinson’s is a journey, so is each young horse like Stirred Not Shaken. Consider this note an invitation for you to take every step of his journey in a monthly update. The journey will be fun. The explanations will be easy to follow. Satire, videos, and bad jokes will be part of the presentation.

Should you have questions as the adventure trots along, we will try to answer them simply and clearly. We might even try to arrange opportunities for you to meet Stirred Not Shaken. If all goes well, you can attend his races or watch them on your computer.

Of course, you can simply not open the monthly link in the Ohio Parkinson’s newsletter, but we hope you will. You will enjoy the ride, a free ride, and a fun ride.

Next month, you will receive a second e-mail where you will meet Stirred Not Shaken.

Be well,

Bob

Maybe this initiative will work out, maybe it won’t, but trying may be a great adventure for people struggling with an illness and anonymous benefactors.